Sometimes a screeching child, children.

There’s always that point In a trip where the initial magic wears off and real colors begin to bleed through, mine, yours there’s, ours. It’s like in a relationship when that first in love infatuation disappears, sometimes we get a bit sensitive.
For me, I get triggered when expectations are not met, which just goes to show that expectations do not lead to the best emotional out come. Secondly, lack of follow through really grinds my gears. It’s hard to have great plans and verbiage but it really means nothing without physical follow up. As a group we hit this pivotal point and our colors where bleeding.
Spirits and energy levels where low and we where headed for our service projects where we would be laying cement… Yup. I let a bit of ego shine threw at a few 15 year olds, they got to me right at the end of the day.
We had one last bag of cement to mix and pour, all the tools to clean and our in country guide was pointing at the ominous black storm front headed for us telling me 30 more minutes; I don’t like leaving a job incomplete. Only a few of the students jumped in to help while the others stood and questioned why the last bag of cement had been opened in the first place; admittedly an honest mistake on someone’s part. My pushy driver side decided to hotly get some boys, that continued to mill and contemplate, to work. My ego trigger, triggered there defensive 15 year old ego, but the cement got laid.
Later that evening my chaperone and I sat down with some of the students and talked out the day. I got some very helpful feedback. It is true in some high intensity situations that are time sensitive I can get impatient. With that impatience I can let communication fall through. These youngsters help me to find self awareness and clarity. Turns out after debriefing the day with the whole group our bleeding colors created a beautiful master piece of teamwork, bonding, awareness and a cement walkway with a tile mosaic.
My third trigger is continuous screening about bugs and spiders in the hotel at all hours. Tonight’s meditation is on purpose:

– consider your purpose at this point in your life.
– consider what you think the purpose of your parents is
– consider the life and goals of the peoples of the community in which we are staying
– consider the purpose of the animals in our immediate surrounding
– consider the the purpose of the bugs and spiders in this establishment, and for just a moment before you smash them with your shoe, consider that a life is a life…